It's been a while since I have blogged. Things have been pretty crazy for me. I'm going back to school, my mom is living with my husband and I, plus I just got promoted at work. As you can imagine, things have been crazy. Good, but crazy.
Last night I asked my mother a question, and got a truthful answer. An answer I didn't like, but an honest one none the less. However, now, I am thinking of asking her to move out to put it nicely. I have supported and walked with my mom through hell and high water. I can't do it anymore. The strain her living here has put on my marriage, is unreal. My husband has wanted her gone for a while, but I'm her daughter. How do I pick between the woman you gave me life, and the man who completed my life? I couldn't. I still don't think I can. She is my mom. We have been together through thick and thin. I know when I "Ask her to leave", that we won't be speaking for a while. There are things that need to be said, that won't be taken well, by both parties involved. I'm lost. I'm confused. I'm mad, sad and angry. Mostly though, I'm hurt. We, (my husband and I) put ourselves out for her. We went out of our way to make sure she had a roof over her head, and this is how she repays us? Forget repaying us actually. We don't want anything in return but really? We get you out of a shitty situation and you just go right back to it? Talk about a slap in the face! Not to mention the fact that you have been everything BUT grateful since you moved in! You started complaining before we had even moved your things in! I'm so......ugh! I don't even know what I am feeling.
I'm lost. I'm fighting voices in my head, I never thought I would hear again. I feel like a failure. Like a horrible daughter. I keep saying it over and over again in my head. "Am I really doing this to her? My mom?". I feel like I'm lost in a sea of faces....
I hope someone can find me.
