STILL waiting...

Social Security Administration....ugh.

I got married 6 months ago. I have yet to officially take my husbands last name! I have applied twice for my new social security card. I have yet to receive my marriage license and a receipt for the last time. I hope I never have to deal with SSA again. This is very frustrating....

Really?

What ever happened to being honest or saying Thank you? It seems like these two ideas have been lost in society. Why is it so hard to be honest, and us your manners? Was I the only one brought up that way?

I have a tattoo across my chest that reads, "No Lies, Just Love". I am not perfect and yes I do lie from time to time. However, when I say "I miss you!!!" I mean it. I'm not just saying it to say it. If you do not miss me, do not say you do. Actions speak louder then words folks. If you can't make time for me, that's fine. If you don't miss me, that's fine too. But when you know I'm coming to see you, and you wait until the last minute to say you won't be home you've made other plans, that is when I get pissed. (Also hurt...mostly hurt actually.)

Thank you works the same way. When I show concern for you or your family, say thank you. Don't just go on about how it's fine and then hang up. The world is falling apart, can't we keep manners?
Would you like a glass of tea? "No THANK YOU!"
"Do you want me to turn around and check on them?" "No I'm sure they are fine. THANK YOU for offering though!"
It's not that hard people.

Still Waiting....

Social Security Administration. UGH! I am still waiting to OFFICIALLY take my husband's last name. We got married in October. This is partly my fault. About a week after our wedding I had surgery and was laid up for a while. So I didn't get the forms turned in right away. However, I did turn them in. I am still waiting on my new SS Card. I really do not like calling offices and getting automated messages. I would much rather talk to an employee. Hopefully I can find out where my card is today.

This weekend we are going to see my in-laws! I'm very excited about that! We haven't been up there since Christmas and I miss them. I LOVE my in-laws. I got lucky and got some great ones! Then Sunday we are going to see my mom and pick up my "new" car. I'm also very excited about that! Not only do I get a car, but I get to see my mommy too! I miss being able to drive myself places. That is a freedom I have always enjoyed. There is nothing like blaring my music and having the wind blow through my hair! I can't wait to have that back.

I'm still waiting to officially take my new last name, and still waiting for a car but over all, things are pretty awesome. And even if they aren't, oh well. ;)

Too Thin?

Do you ever feel like you've taken too much on? Like you are stretching yourself too thin? Have you ever felt upset, sad or angry and you don't know why? This is how I have been feeling since yesterday. I'm crying for no reason and then getting super pissed off. (again for no reason.) Sometimes it just feels like I have no control over anything in my life. I try turning to God for guidance but I'm still new at that. Sometimes I just need someone to hold me and let me cry. Rub my back and tell me everything will be OK-even if you do not know. This is where my husband comes in...but he's a guy. Let's face it, they aren't the greatest at picking up on emotions, and I don't feel right saying "just hold me and tell me it'll be ok".

My mom is trying to move back to my home town. I'm trying to help her find an apartment and a job. I do this because I love her. She has done anything and everything she could do to make sure I had a good life. Why not help her? I'm going to talk to my landlord today to see if he has any openings, close to me, that would be good for her.

Between helping my mom and dealing with the bull shit going on at work, it's hard to focus on anything else. I'm trying though. I'm trying to stay positive and up beat. I'm trying to learn how to lean on God and trust that He will see me through it.


Wish me luck............

Happy Friday!

My mom is coming to visit today! We've got big plans! We are going to lunch, and going to get our hair done! I'm going from a brunette to a red head! wow! I'm kind of nervous now. My mom thinks it will looks stupid but I've wanted to get it done for a while, so I'm going to. If I look stupid, oh well. It's just hair. I can always dye it back.

I also found out this morning that my brother and his wife were at the hospital early this morning! My niece was brought into the world early. Baby and mom are both doing really well. I've only gotten to see pictures so far but she is B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L and I love her already! I can't wait to hold her in my arms and shower her with love for the rest of my life!

What a wonderful day this is going to be!

Happy Friday!

Family, Friends and Tears...

Yesterday was a very busy day! My husband woke  me up to tell me his mom and nephews were coming to see us! I was excited about that! I love his family! His mom brought us lunch and we all just hung out and talked. It was a very lovely afternoon with loved ones.

Then, we had to go to a funeral. This was, of course, very sad. I saw a lot of people I haven't seen in a while. However, the service was all in Spanish so we didn't understand anything. I was amazed by just how many cars there were. Even more amazing was the amount of people that filled those cars. The church was PACKED. She really did touch the lives of so many people. It was nice to see them all come out to say their final goodbyes, but still very sad. We followed the funeral procession. There were a handful of cars that pulled off to the side of the road and waited for us to pass. Very respectful and touching. Unfortunately we could not follow them all the way to the burial site. At least I was able to say goodbye.

After the funeral, we ran home so I could change. Then it was off my sister-in-laws baby shower! That was a lot of fun! We played some games, had dinner and cake. She got a lot of stuff as well! I can't wait to meet my niece! Just a couple more weeks and she will be here! I have that day off work and everything! She will be born via c-section so I can do that this time.

After the baby shower, my mom came back to my house with me. She told me a little more about what is going on with her. There were a lot of tears shed then. Like I previously said, I do not feel right talking about her business so that is as much as I will say. I'm really hoping things start getting better for her. It's hard to stay hopeful knowing what I know, but I just want what is best for her. She told me not to worry about her. That is not going to happen. Not only is my mom...well...my mom, she is also my best friend aside from my husband. OF COURSE I'm going to worry about her! Hopefully she will realize soon that she is a beautiful, intelligent and strong woman. Until then, I'll be here to remind her.

Today was a lazy day and it was very nice after the go go go of yesterday. My husband let me sleep until about 12:30. I really needed the extra sleep. Then we just watched DVDs and took a nap later in the afternoon. He is working for four hours tonight so I am home alone now. I'm very thankful that we got to spend so much time together today. That was defiantly what I needed after the week we've had.

Back to work tomorrow. I'm crossing my fingers for a drama free night. If I can avoid certain people this should not be a problem.

Death, a little Life, and Love.

What a stress filled day today! In general, this week, it just seems like every day I wake up, there is something new to worry about.

A very close family friend died this week. Valentine's day to be exact. I have known this woman my whole life. Literally.  You would never know she had a bad day. She always had a huge smile on her face, and big hugs for everyone. The last time I saw her was in October at my wedding. She was so happy for me, and she seemed fine. I guess a lot can happen in a few months. Her viewing was today and sadly I couldn't go. I had to work, plus I don't have a vehicle and couldn't find a ride. Tomorrow is her funeral. (I also have a baby shower to go to tomorrow. From one extreme to the next!)  I just can't wrap my head around the fact that she is gone. I can't even BEGIN to imagine how her family is feeling. I don't think there was a single person, EVER, who could have met this lady and not loved her. She really was a gem, and she will TRULY be missed. 

Aside from her death, it's mostly been the normal things stressing me out. Bills, the lack of money to pay them, things at work,...you know, the normal stuff. However, my mom called with some pretty upsetting news this morning...Well, text is more like it. Although I would like to discuss it, I don't feel right writing about other people's  business. One major thing to keep in mind...My mom and I are very close. I tell her everything and we confide in each other on a regular basis. So, when I hurt, she hurts. When she hurts, I hurt. I haven't stopped hurting for her since she told me the news. Don't worry, she isn't dying or anything, things just aren't going well for her. I wish I could be there to comforter her but she lives an hour and a half away from me. I know she knows I care and that I am just a phone call away, but as far as I'm concerned, that isn't good enough. She used to lay in my bed with me and hold me as I cried. No matter what it was about. I wish I could be there to do the same for her. (Mom, if you read this, I love you.)

My husband is working over tonight. I hate being home alone. Especially when I'm feeling the way I do today. He seems to like his new job pretty well though, and it pays good too. I miss him when he leaves everyday, and worry about him until he is home in my arms again. He seems to be working over a lot recently. Any normal girl would think she was being cheated on. I won't say that thought hasn't crossed my mind. I'd be lying if I did. However, I trust my husband. He would never do anything to hurt me intentionally in anyway, shape or form. He loves me. I love him. He is my missing puzzle piece and I am his. Things moved rather quickly between us, but when you know, you know. Why wait? All I know, is that when I said I do, I meant it with every fiber in my being.

In this day and age it seems like people think of marriage as something temporary. Everyday, more and more people get divorced. Another thing I can't wrap my mind around. How can you take that vow and break it so quickly over something stupid like the other person deleting a show from the DVR? Society baffles me and I doubt I will ever understand. How can you just toss someone, that you have devoted your life to, off to the side like a piece of trash? If you love someone one day, how can you turn around and fall out of love the next? It shouldn't be that easy. If it is, I doubt you ever loved them to begin with.